A few weeks ago, we started building our routines with making time for prayer and personal care/hygiene. This time we are going to continue making our routines, focusing on our partners, our parenting, and our role as provider.
It’s easy with kids (especially little ones) to put them before out spouses, but that’s really not the order of things. We will start out alone with them and will end up alone with them. Don’t lose them along the way! It’s super important to MAKE the time with your spouse. If you have to trade sitter time with friends, set your alarm for the middle of the night, or start a family feud by putting your littles in daycare one morning a week, it’s really something that needs to be done. Time with your spouse needs to come before everything else.
Things to consider when planning your role as partner:
- How can I arrange for alone-time with my spouse? When? What will we do? Where will the kids be?
- Are there things that I can do that will help him out? Giving him time for prayer? Errands I can run? Calls I can make?
- Are you praying for him? What does he need?
- Do the two of you have issues that might need outside help? Grudges? Anything that will weaken your marriage instead of making it stronger?
It would seem that parenting would be the easiest to make a routine of, just because you probably already have one. School pickup, outside activities and things like that require that you have some sort of routine or schedule set up, more so if you homeschool.
Very similiar to your own priorities, there are several things to think about when scheduling your time to assist your children:
- What are the prayer practices for the children? Their hygiene & eating needs? Time with you & your spouse? School? Sports/Activities?
- Do they need anything to do the things they need to do?
- Do they know how to do things for themselves? Do their things have “homes”? Do they know where that is?
- Do you need to make time to show them, teach them or help them with anything?
The last role is also kind of the doozy. Society puts so much emphasis on this role that it’s easy to get the priorities messed up. That’s why we started with the Big Rocks, to use a Franklin Covey term. Your provider covers everything else:
- Money Management (purchasing, bill paying, etc.)
- Cooking (meal planning, cooking, shopping, etc.)
- Working (helping husband, going to work, etc.)
- Housekeeping (house & lawn maintenance, cleaning, organizing, etc.)
- Decorating, celebrating, making your house a home.
It’s pretty much anything that involves management of your gifts and making the home a safe, secure, loving place for your family.
Think on these areas for a week or so before putting anything into your routine. You will probably find that you will be rearranging your schedule slightly to fit in the primary tier things but that your normal existing routine will just be refined and tweaked a bit. Again, you want to leave plenty of wiggle room, especially if you have little ones at home, They are unpredictable and you can’t have everything so tightly scheduled that you get bent out of shape if they “prohibit your progress” of your routine/to-do list. Ask me how I know :).
I know lots of things have been eliminated from my list since I had children. Washing walls? hahahahaha…. Cleaning bathroom floors? sometimes. Washing the entryway floor? not usually. Sweeping the deck porch? Please. Unless they are amusing themselves nearby, these are not priorities and they definitely don’t fit the routine. Even cleaning the fridge doesn’t rate a spot on the routine. I wait until it’s so dirty I can’t stand it. Ditto for the cabinets and any “detail” cleaning. It’s just not that important. Not when my schedule is full of other things.
Do you have any other things that you would consider while planning for these roles? Leave them in the comments below!